Coping with grief
Everyone is different
Grief is a natural response to loss; it’s the emotional suffering you feel when you lose someone or something you love. The feelings that follow the death of a loved one can be the most intense grief you will ever feel.
Grieving takes time
Everyone grieves differently; it is a personal and highly individual experience. There is no right or wrong way of grieving and no right or wrong length of time to grieve for. How you grieve depends on many factors including your personality and coping style, your life experience, your faith and the nature of the loss. There is no way to predict how you will grieve and the most important thing is to allow yourself to do so. Give yourself time, have patience and let others help you.
The grieving process takes time and healing happens gradually – it can’t be forced or hurried. Some people start to feel better in weeks or months, for others the grieving process is measured in years. When you lose a loved one, there will be times throughout your whole life when you will feel sadness. Birthdays, Christmas and anniversaries can be especially difficult times. This does not mean that you will always experience the same level of intense feelings that follow the loss of a loved one. You will never forget them and it is perfectly natural to feel sad many years after your loss, but you will feel better and it will get easier.
If you feel unable to talk to your family and friends, don’t worry. While you may have a strong support network, sometimes you need to talk to a person who isn’t involved in your life, or the life of the deceased. There are many organisations who can help. Talking to someone impartial can be very helpful and they may be able to offer you advice on coping strategies.
This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t talk to your family and friends about how you are feeling. While you may not want to go into depth, it is important for those around you to understand that you are suffering. Keeping your emotions bottled up never makes them go away.
As funeral directors, Williams and Lowe are here to offer you all the support we can. We can also direct you to organisations in your area that can help. If you are feeling like you cannot cope, please don’t suffer in silence; there are so many people who want to help.
24 hour telephone listening service 0845 7909090
Crewe (not always manned) 01270 216666
Bereavement Care for the Potteries and North Staffordshire
Support and counselling for people who are bereaved 01782 683155
(Bereavement Care will see anyone from Cheshire although you will have to make your own way to their centre.)